Archive for May, 2011

Burn me as a witch!

May 28, 2011

ryan giggs

Hola. Hope you are well.

Since my blog post, Ryan Giggs has been outed in the Commons as the footballer linked with Imogen Thomas, who knew??? Well everyone on Twitter and anyone with the ability to put Imogen Thomas and Premiership footballer into a search engine. The only cautionary note, that the player is not Ryan Giggs is that the MP who unveiled his name is a Liberal Democrat and we’ve learnt over the past year to take what they say as a pinch of salt. I honestly don’t think football fans really care what players get up to in their personal life but when they start threatening to sue Twitter or Google (in Ashley Cole’s case) people start to think they are an idiot.

Talking of Twitter, I read that Ben Foster got caught breaking a club curfew, after staying out late til the early hours of the morning. He was found out because the wife of Colin Doyle, (the Birmingham City reserve goalkeeper) tweeted his whereabouts as she was unhappy with his behaviour.  This did make me wonder who is following the wife of the Birmingham City reserve goalkeeper on Twitter. Do these people not know there are other things on the internet? (Like football blogs from unknown comedians)

Talking of trouble on a club do brings me to West Ham’s end of season bash, I’m not sure why they left it til May, they surely could have had it back in January. Anyway at the party Demba Ba was abused (racially or not) by a fan who attended, which seems quite harsh as I thought he was one of their better players this season. Surely there were plenty more players this bloke could have attacked. But the most shocking thing about this, was that after the season West Ham have just had, tickets for this event were £275 per head, which just goes to show this man definitely had more money than sense.

West Ham may have been relegated but I was glad Wigan and Blackburn stayed up on the last day of the season. Wigan because Roberto Martinez seems like a good guy and Blackburn because if the went down people would point to Sam Allardyce’s sacking as the pivotal decision. I also think there is a perceived lack of respect for the Venkys. I think it stems largely from the fact that they are Indian and have made their money from chickens. People don’t seem to have the same problem with the billionaire owners who have made their money from oil (Man City) or however Abramovich has made his money. I would say however, that if you can make millions from chickens you are arguably a better business person than those making money from oil.

And Finally… At the start of the season I got my girlfriend to pull out of a ‘hat’ all the Premier league clubs and then out of another hat to pull out the place they would finish this season (see here). I’ve just looked at my predictions and checked them against the actual final standings and surprise surprise there were no exact matches. But it did throw some up some semi interesting quirks. Firstly, I predicted Blackpool would finish 15th, in fact Blackburn finished 15th, both teams start their names with BLACK. Secondly, I had Man City to finish 13th, as it happened Stoke finished 13th, they of course contested the FA Cup Final. Thirdly, I had Birmingham to finish 11th but in reality West Brom finished 11th, but as we know West Brom and Birmingham are geographically close. And finally I had Aston Villa to finish 10th, in the real world they actually finished 9th, making me one out. Burn me as a witch!

Til next time, stay safe!

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You’re Fired

May 21, 2011

pippa middleton

Hola. Hope you are well.

For the last number of years I’ve heard football people on the radio and the tv and in newspapers talking about how we can get the magic of the FA Cup back. Now I’m no expert, and there are probably a number of reasons why the FA Cup isn’t as popular as it used to be, including the fact that  finishing fourth in the Premier League is seen as more important or that when I was growing up the FA Cup Final used to be one of the few games you could see live in a season, whereas these days you can watch football everyday of the week if you so wish (and your other half allows).

But it probably doesn’t help  to maintain the ‘romance of the cup’  if you schedule the Final on the same day as Premiership matches, but not just any Premiership matches but one that  will see Man Utd crowned as champions for a record-breaking  19th time, less than half an hour before the Kick Off at Wembley. There’s always a chance this will overshadow proceedings. It’s a bit like marrying a Prince and second in line to the crown and then your sister turns up and all the attention turns towards her ass.

Having said all that, I’m pretty sure at the end of the game Man City fans couldn’t care less what had happened prior to their game. To them it was all about ending 35 years without a trophy. And good luck to them, it’s always nice to see a club winning things when they’ve had to do it on a limited budget, albeit a budget limited to over £100m for the last two summers.

Onto West Ham and they got rid of their manager Avram Grant one hour after they were relegated this Sunday. It does beg the question why do it then and not leave it til the close season (one game away), it’s almost as if Gold, Sullivan and Karren Brady wanted to make a statement pointing out that the clubs failures had nothing to do with them and everything to do with the manager. It’s almost as if they think we will forget that they 1) hired him, 2) spent the rest of the time undermining him and 3) openly tried to replace him with Martin O’Neill. I wonder what Gianfranco Zola thinks of it all, it was him after all they sacked when him keeping them in the league wasn’t deemed good enough.

On to Robbie Savage and does anyone else think it’s weird how this quite average footballer has re-invented himself into  a semi-serious pundit and broadcaster. He even won a Sony award for rising star at the recent Sony’s. It’s odd how things turn out, he must have been in the same Leicester midfield as Neil Lennon (I’ve not checked if this is fact) and if at the time someone had said one of these guys is going to be a Sony award winner and one of is going to be the most hated man in football, I would have guessed Neil Lennon would be the award winner. Not because of his talents behind the mic,  but more to do with Robbie Savage’s natural ability to wind up opposing fans.

On my last blog post, I got a comment from a certain Sir Alex Ferguson, it was definitely him and in no way was it one of my friends playing silly buggers. He now joins the growing number of people who have contacted me. Barack Obama has previously contacted me on this blog and Colonel Gaddafi has contacted me on my personal blog (Inside the mind of an unknown comedian). I’m grateful for any famous persons endorsement  so at this point I will leave it to you the reader to decide if Mr Ferguson’s leadership style is more like Barack’s or Gaddafi’s.

And Finally… Good news for this blog, as this month (May) has seen the highest number of hits since I started this blog. So cheers to anyone who’s taken time out to read it.

Til next time, stay safe!