Archive for March, 2011

It’s the way you tell them Fernando

March 20, 2011

Bob Wilson

Hola. Hope you are well.

It seems like quite a lot of things have happened in football since my last blog post, so I think I’ll just go through them, starting with why I generally don’t do predictions.

Before Liverpool’s Europa Cup game against Braga, I texted a friend and said, “If Liverpool don’t concede they should go through”. Well they didn’t concede, and went out by virtue of losing the away leg 1-0. It’s foresight like this, why my local bookies has more of my money than I have of theirs.

Possibly the oddest piece of news this week (and possibly many weeks) was that Fulham are going to erect a statue of Michael Jackson outside their ground at the request of their owner Mohamed Al Fayed. No disrespect to the late ‘King of pop’ but I would hardly describe him as a Fulham legend. Surely there are more deserving candidates. It does beg the question, why? and where will this end? Maybe Michael Jackson’s estate will reciprocate the gesture by erecting a statue of Bobby Zamora outside Neverland.

In other news Kolo Toure failed a drug test. Arsene Wenger was one of the first people from the football world to come out and defend him, saying he’d spoken to Kolo and that the source of the banned substance, must have come after Kolo took some of his wife’s slimming pills. Knowing women as I do (moderately) I bet his wife is peeved that the world thinks/knows she’s taking slimming pills.

Talking of Arsene Wenger, his Arsenal have managed to be dumped out of 2 more cup competitions since my last blog post. (I don’t think the quadruple is going to happen now). I do feel slightly sorry that for the second season running Arsenal have been out played by Barcelona. The reason I say this is because Barca, out Arsenal, Arsenal. In the premiership Arsenal are the team with all the flowing football and the ability to pass teams into submission. But when they come up against Barcelona, they are at the receiving end of such treatment. I imagine it’s like a woman turning up to a function in a new dress and getting complimented on her look, only for Kolo Toure’s wife to turn up, with her new slimline figure in the exact same dress but looking even better in it than you.

In other Arsenal news, they brought Jens Lehmann back to the club, on a short-term contract, due to Arsenal’s goalkeeping crisis. It does seem quite remarkable considering Jens retired from football over a year ago and that Arsene deemed him not good enough for Arsenal a few years ago. It seems Lehmann got the gig because he’s ex-Arsenal and he was around the club (as he’s doing part of his coaching badges there) which makes me assume on that basis Bob Wilson couldn’t have been that far off from being asked to dust off his gloves again.

It’s also good to see that Fernando Torres, has given up scoring goals and is now taking up a less lucrative career of comedy. I say this after reading his comments about being at Chelsea, “Here you don’t have to demonstrate that you are professional. It’s taken as the minimum”. This coming just a couple of weeks after Chelsea player Ashley Cole shot a student at the Chelsea training ground. But I’m sure Fernando was aware of this, as he knows the secret of comedy is in the timing.

And Finally… it would appear Alex Ferguson has gone a little more mad than usual. Firstly he stopped talking to the press, including Man Utd’s own in-house station MUTV. Then he accused Graham Taylor of having a short memory, because Graham Taylor had the temerity to say he didn’t think Mr Ferguson should so openly criticise referees. Fergie hit back by referencing Graham Taylor’s infamous rant when as England manager he told the fourth official/linesman to tell the referee he’s cost him his job. This happened in 1994. You can’t accuse someone of having a short memory for not referencing something that happened 17 years ago. If anything, Fergie has too long a memory. In many ways he’s the elephant of the football world.

Til next time, stay safe!

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Love me for a reason

March 2, 2011

Hola. Hope you are well.

I think I will start this blog post by looking back at Sunday’s Carling Cup Final and poor old Arsenal. Don’t get me wrong I quite like Arsenal but they are increasingly becoming more and more like the kid in school who does brilliant course work but complains because they can’t perform in exams. Having said that, Birmingham’s winning goal was funny.

I was going to say the most bizarre story in football since my last blog post was the fact Kenny Dalglish and Andy Carroll turned up at a Boyzone concert. I’m not sure out of the two of them who I’m more surprised to learn was at a Boyzone concert. Apparently Kenny is a friend of Ronan Keating as they are golf buddies. That’s Kenny Dalglish a legend and Ronan Keating, who isn’t. Under normal circumstances these two would never meet, this fact alone must give kudos to those would like to ban golf.

As I mentioned, the above story was going to be the most bizarre story until I learnt Ashley Cole had shot a work experience student at Chelsea’s training ground. That is a sentence I genuinely never thought I’d be writing. Often I try to defend footballers but on this one I’m struggling. For starters, what idiot thinks it is ok to take a gun into their place of work? Even if you were a soldier, you wouldn’t be bringing your gun from home. Unless Chelsea have introduced a ‘bring your gun to work day’ then Ashley Cole hasn’t got a leg to stand on, which is ironic as this was almost the case for the student.

What I don’t understand about the incident, is that in a small area that contained many highly paid footballers, including John Terry, how come fate decreed it would be the lad who isn’t getting paid to be there that would get shot.

And Finally…I happened to be listening to a report on the radio about the dire financial plight of Plymouth Argyle, when it mentioned Peter Risdale is their financial adviser. I thought surely not the same Peter Risdale who was involved when Leeds Utd crumbled financially, or the same Peter Risdale who was involved with Cardiff City when they faced closure due to money owed to HMRC, but it was the very same Peter Risdale. His ability to continue getting work with football clubs despite his previous failings is unbelievable. It’s on a par with Kerry Katona’s ability to get people to go out with her despite her being Kerry Katona.

Til next time, stay safe!